Friday, October 21, 2011

In the Quiet

The house is quiet. Cana is sleeping. Evie is upstairs playing a game. Melody and Ruby are out. Steve is at work and the other grandchildren won't be here for an hour. I am reflecting on the burst of activity in my life and how for most of it I had to sit passively as I watched it happen around me. I am blessed and grateful for all this activity that was directed at moving me on to a healthier place. Physically, emotionally and spiritually.

I have yet to get the results of my pathology from my operation. I don't know what is going to happen in my tomorrows. But I fell good. I am not anxious or in fear.
When this is all over I will be officially retired from the US Postal Service. YAY!!!! I have worked since I was 13 years old. During the 'baby' years I took children into our home and worked part time jobs like school crossing guard, cleaned offices, this and that. In 1986 when my 'baby' was three years old I stared at the Post Office. Since that time every Saturday has been a work day. I have not been able to be involved in women's study groups or coffee times. For the first time in ....ever.....I don't have to set my alarm clock!
Because I can't lift anything heavier than a milk jug it cramps my style a bit and I can't dive in the way I would like to. For months I have been piling things in various places knowing that I would be able to really organize my home as soon as I retired. Sure didn't count on this. However....I do have a Melody in my life who is tearing through my piles, staying up late every night and restoring order to my neglected home. Mostly I watch her and try to help with the kids cause she is like me and finds it easier to 'do it myself'. So I humbley let her. So even if I can't do what I have been waiting to do for months it is nice to have it being done just the same. And she is more ruthless than me and 'encourages' me to toss out things I may have otherwise kept.
I understand a little why people on the Hoarders show get so upset. If 'helping' a person is not done with a caring attitude it can make you feel really threatened. And old. Melody does not make me feel this way.
So with Gwenn here to do my makeover and straighten out my paper work (because I honestly could not handle that right now without crying) and Melody straightening out my home ...well..I feel like I am ready to take on this retirement thing full on!
In this quiet..I am thankful for this journey. For my family. To my God. Life is good. Come what may.

1 comment:

  1. "Thankful, for this journey.....Life IS Good.....Come what may" Thanks, Denise, for this reminder........THIS is the way I want to live my life!! Still praying with you.....

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